Conor Benn Asks If We Think He’s An Idiot

There are plenty more really smart folks in boxing than most would believe, and even the not-that-bright bunch are ahead of British welterweight Conor Benn, if we did an official tally.

I’m not being a punk, too much, when I write the above. If you are thinking I took too hard of a free shot low blow, check out what the son of the UK pugilistic living semi legend Nigel Benn, a massive draw and talent at 160 and 168 in the 80s and 90s, said to the Sun newspaper.

Don’t answer that!

Dad had more pop than son, who debuted as a pro in 2016, but Nigel has dad beat in the force with which he inserts his feet in mouth.

The young talked to the Sun, which took a lay back approach, so Conor Benn would give them the time. This is a section at the top of the Sun story: “In Benn’s corner is a thorough timeline of events, low levels of the substance found in his system, a range of later VADA and UK Anti-Doping tests that he passed, an expert doping lawyer in Mike Morgan — as well as plausible possible explanations from contaminated foods to faulty testing.”

The boxer has been dissed far and wide for misplaying his reaction to testing positive for the presence of clomifene in his body, forcing the cancellation of the Oct 8 battle vs. Chris Eubank Jr. The continuation of the Benn-Eubank rivalry—Benn the elder lost their 1990 battle via TKO, Benn drew with Eubank senior in the 1993 sequel—plug got pulled 48 hours ahead of the promotion, headed up by Eddie Hearn and his Matchroom Boxing.

Hearn, at left, knew that Conor Benn had tested positive twice, at this juncture

The 26 year old Benn was silent, then acted bewildered, then switched to antagonistic defensiveness. To the Sun, he presented a defense which is a favorite of persons accused of doing something bad, appealing to the common sense and conscience of the listener/critic. “It baffles me that people think I have cheated after seeing me on TV for so long, what I am like with my team, family and dad. Am I a serial liar?”

Not sure about serial, but bald faced BSer? Sure looks like it.

Conor Benn is wanting us to believe that he tested positive twice and neither time did he ingest clomifene.

According to the Sun, “A VADA test taken on July 25 came back with an adverse finding towards the end of August but Benn’s camp treated the red flag as an accident or error.”

That deserves an LOL, no?

Wally Downs Jr did a nifty job maintaining a certain stance in the piece. Here is phrasing from the wily wordsmith: “But a second test taken on September 1 and reported on September 23 triggered more alarm bells.

Benn feared he was spiked by someone in or around some of the gyms he uses.

He has even researched clomifene and discovered it is being used to boost egg production in chickens.”

Bawk bawk, how can you not squawk in cynical merriment at all that?

Conor Benn, the story says, wants you to think “containment” at the lab caused that first red flagged sample. Nothing we haven’t heard from 80% of busted athletes in the last 20 years. The verbiage reminded me some of what you’d hear after Big Baby Miller would get busted. 

“I passed all my UKAD tests, which people aren’t talking about. I’ve passed all my tests in and out of camp. I’ve been a professional for seven years and never failed a test,” Benn continued to shovel his hole deeper. “I signed up to VADA in February, so it doesn’t  make any sense. Why would I take something then?”

Want me to answer that? Prolly he doesn’t, but I will anyway.

Because people cheat to gain an edge. The mere act suggests a certain impulsivity, or at the least morally iffy level of ambition. Maybe one would sign up in February because one was clean then?

What a Fight Week it was!

More from the new AB, About Bullshit: “Trace amounts were found. The tiniest of traces. The only thing I can think of is contamination.

“I’ve not taken anything. I never have done, never would. It’s not what I stand for, it’s not what my team stands for.”

Conor Benn fights at 147, that’s sure as hell not his IQ…There were “trace amounts” of Bill Clinton on Monica’s dress, doesn’t mean somethin’ didn’t happen, sir.

If he had a lawyer and this was court, the lawyer would be totally Teddy Atlas at this point:

“The traces were so low there was no benefit. The science will prove that. I’ve got the best scientists on this. And I am now spending a lot of money trying to prove my innocence here. A lot of money,” said Conor Benn, calling to mind Donald Trump announcing he’d hired a private investigator to solve the “mystery” of Barak Obama’s origins. Mocking Trump for that propelled him to block me on Twitter, if I recall correctly.

Idiotic on social media, too

Benn for good measure threw enough darts at the British Boxing Board of Control to make his eventual return to fighting under their auspices a luxury he will have to grovel heavily to enjoy.

The BBBoC hates me prolly because my dad took a public stand against them on TV in the 90s, he told the Sun. 

Bro, here’s the same advice you’d get from a good lawyer, minus the $25,000 retainer: You now have the right to remain silent, use it.

Conor Benn, take this to heart, it applies to you, as you seem to be repping yourself. Benjamin Franklin, or Abraham Lincoln, or maybe it was Norman Stone advised that, ‘A lawyer who represents himself in court has a fool for a client.’ You are making yourself look like a massive idiot, in fact. Take the L, and your remaining dignity, shut up and do your time.