The State [October 2019]: Bud Wiser

Panty inspector / Back shots redirect her / Quiet wit my shit like a CIA Director / I’m a one-man gang I’ll hang bang any defense / Di Spence wit your planning / You’ll swear I was Peyton Manning, I’ll.. / I’ll spread you out dog / I’ll pick you apart / Fill you wit darts / This is what I’ll do for the love of art

–Terence “Bud” Crawford, rapping in my sleep on TMZ about exposing and going #ManDown on Errol “The Truth” Spence like ASAP

###

Oh they’re good. I’ve been a fan of TMZ in the same way you are of People Magazine; when you have like 3 items in your hand in the express aisle, and there’s an asshole in front of you with like 50 items trying to front like he has 10 and won’t let you get ahead. Whatever. I guess I’ll see if Brad Pitt is headed for an empty space, or if the clouds behind Taylor Swift on the cover of “Lover” really is pink cotton-candy. Yeah. That kind of fan. The I’m-on-the-treadmill-and-TMZ-is-on-and-there-is-nothing-I-can-fucking-do-about-it-until-my-time-expires kind of fan. But on this cool autumn morning, I have to stop everything I’m doing or about to do, because it’s not everyday the WBO welterweight champion of the world shows up and drops BOMBS.

“Take off the panties and sign the contract,” fired up Bud on TMZ, seriously smoking his own shit and dumping the ashes all over “The Truth.”

By now, Spence, the new WBC/IBF welterweight champion who recently edged Shawn Porter, has gotten a whiff of this and wants all the smoke. The two have been trading blows over Twitter ever since running into each other behind the scenes at Hooker Vs Saucedo in Oklahoma City last November. There, Spence claimed he was “‘The Dog @147”, while Crawford told “The Truth” he was fat and to stop lying.

Present that day to witness the scrum was Top Rank boss Bob Arum, who has also (in so many words) told Al Haymon to stop window shopping in front of Victoria’s Secret and just make the damn fight. I thought Crawford was wise to get in front of the tabloids while keeping it real — he played this one beautifully. The pound-for-pound sensation from Omaha will most likely be back in action at Madison Square Garden on December 14 against a really mean bastard in Lithuanian Egidijus Kavaliauskas. Meanwhile Spence, arguably the world’s best fighter not named Vasiliy Lomachenko, will scout Crawford as carefully as he will attempt to scalp Danny “Swift” Garcia, in a bout tentatively set for January 25.

If both champions prevail (and they should), then that means whatever unfinished business between legends Floyd Mayweather and WBA welterweight champion Manny Pacquiao would seemingly loom on the horizon for Spence. As for Crawford, he also dropped a subliminal at former unified champion Keith “One-Time” Thurman, who two years ago stated Bud needed to ‘whack up a welterweight’, while also saying in the same breath that “ain’t nobody worried about Jeff Horn overseas… that’s real talk.” Neither Thurman nor the aforementioned Shawn Porter has ever been stopped, as representatives for Bud would be none the wiser to strike a deal with no less than one of those opponents, to realistically make Spence Vs Crawford a generational Superfight comparable to Sugar Ray Leonard Vs Thomas “Hitman” Hearns. If that scenario plays out, it would almost make up for the travesty of ideological divide that ruined a modern Muhammad Ali Vs Joe Frazier in Floyd Mayweather Vs Manny Pacquiao.    

###

I’d be somewhat remiss if not mentioning the merits of Shawn Porter once more. An uncanny amalgam of Leon Spinks and Henry Armstrong on Adderall, Porter has at times — by this writer even, been written off as if a Janitor in Everlast gear and it isn’t fair. Recently, Porter (a 2-time world champion) appeared on Max on Boxing, as Kellerman worked hard to uncover with Shawn just how he could somehow get over the top at the elite level. Max is brilliant and Porter can be described as extremely sharp; neither of them could figure out what Porter needs to do to just get over the hump.

Three things jumped out: Shawn Porter is just a genuinely good human being and he doesn’t have a signature punch or signature moments. I was at the Gennadiy Golovkin Vs Sergiy Derevyanchenko bout at Madison Square Garden this past Saturday night and Triple G won by the slimmest of margins. I thought he should have lost by the same. But though he’s a nice guy, there’s something villainous about him that resonates in ways subtle. Whenever fans watch fights, they keep their eyes on who they are rooting for, while not so much seeing what the other guy is actually doing — unless he has a signature moment. Gennadiy Golovkin makes up for charm by having two signature punches: his thunderous left jab and devastating left hook. His left hook gave him a signature moment that “his fans” rewarded him for in victory. Shawn Porter doesn’t have a go-to punch and he doesn’t score a knockdown. It is why he lost to Kell Brook, Keith Thurman and now Errol Spence Jr. It was Pacquiao’s patented variety that scored a knockdown over Keith Thurman — the difference in the fight. Just as it was the chopping left hook of Errol Spence Jr that dropped Porter — the difference in the fight. In short, he’s been bested because the crowd hasn’t loved him. Or, as Proximo from “Gladiator” would say: “I was the best because the crowd loved me. Win the crowd. And you will win your freedom.”

And it would be wise to fight Bud.